On a whim, I called my Lover long distance. I hadn't seen or heard from him in a couple of days and my mind was racing with all sorts of worst case scenarios so I thought I'd put myself out of my misery and just find out for myself.
He was home. He just spent the last four days in SF with his brother. He said he found himself the perfect fuck situation. He is now a sexual surrogate for a Thai girl and her husband. He fucks her about twice a week. He's not doing anyone else.
He though that that kind of situation would make it better for me since the girl was married and it seemed (to him) happily so. I suppose I should be pleased, shouldn't I? I, of all people, should know since I've had experience in extra-marital affairs for almost a decade already. Wasn't this better than him making a connection with all these single women who might pounce on him at any time? Oh, I dunno. More on this later.
He told me not to worry. To stop thinking and just relax and I said that I wasn't really worried. I did tell him though that it was bra girl that really bothered me. She who left two pieces of ordinary bras at his place. Then the questions poured over -- Did he let her sleep over? (yes, he did) How come she can be his friend and I can't? How come she went with him to Reno? How come she gets to go to weddings with him?
He said that I was like the Spanish Inquisition but I wasn't done. I had a couple more questions -- did he like her? (he said only enough to pull her panties down) Does he love her? Is he in love with her? He said no to all of the above.
Then again, what does it matter if he didn't if in the same breath, he didn't like me that much or love me either? I still haven't gathered the courage to ask that question. I do intend to one of these days. Cut to the chase. It seems pretty pointless to hang around someone who doesn't like me that much.
What he said was that there was no one like me. I was in a category of my own. I said that that was my line and he wasn't allowed to use it. He also said I was difficult but when I asked him if he would rather not have known me, he said no and that was the end of that.
We talked about some other stuff. He said I should get more cock. He told me about his itinerary for his European tour. For some reason, he just wants to spend time in the mountains there. We talked about my birthday and reminded him to greet me.
They say that in love, there is a crystalization process that only absence can bring. That's what happens when I don't get to talk to him and then when I finally do, I'm reminded of how mundane and inconsequential his existence is and my existence is relative to his that I'm snapped right back to earth.
We're so wrong for each other. This is so pointless. The guy simply doesn't have any feelings when it comes to me. And I hate myself for turning into this -- I don't even know how to describe it. I simply cannot make myself be a cool customer in his presence. I just fall apart and turn into this petulant and suspicious lover.
The realist in me wants to sever ties already. To call a spade a spade and move on. I am sorely tempted to write him a letter to tell him everything I feel. That I deserve much more than what he's willing to give me. The competitive person in me wants to hang on, to prove to myself that sheer persistence will turn the tide. In a previous blog, I think I signed on for four years, until such time that he was emotionally ready. I'm not past year one yet and I find myself faltering. I am questioning the prize at this point.
Then there's also the fact that I really DO think too much. I could be over reacting and yet, on the other end of the spectrum, I just feel wrong for being treated like this. I almost broached up the topic of "the blind leading the blind" in our conversation earlier. He didn't quite hear it so he asked me to repeat it and I buckled down and changed the topic.
I've been watching the last season of Sex and the City and our relationship -- oh, I forgot, "dynamic" is what we call it -- is like Steve and Miranda's. Type A meets Type B. Control freak seeking to relinquish control ISO doormat seeking to gain control to prevent emasculation. Not exactly the healthiest dynamic.
I told him I wanted to be friends. I'm not sure he heard it. Or that he equated it with a change in our dynamic. Perhaps I should be more emphatic next time.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Saturday, May 26, 2007
The Morning After
I got totally freaked out the morning after the whole intimate thing. As usual, my panic attack was accompanied by physical symptoms. My breathing was shallow. I couldn't focus very much on anything and I had the urge to run as far as I could from this man.
I ended up giving Lover that "drunken phone call", except that I wasn't drunk and it cost a lot more since I called long distance. I got his machine and told him that I didn't know why I called, told him about my freak out episode and was just basically looking for him. He still hasn't surfaced for air ever since I told him M was in town. I dunno. Maybe he's busy. Whether it's work or another object of his affection (or his cock's affection for that matter), I don't know.
I spent the night with M and was with him until he left for the airport. We had standing arrangments to get together for a "delicious goodbye" last night but his clients took him out and a bit late became later and then later still. This was so reminiscent of the fights I had with my lover that it definitely seemed like deja vu. I didn't know if M was really busy or if he was really out with clients or out on a date or if he was just really not interested and was blowing me off. But of course, I would like to think myself wiser for the experience with my lover and I now know that pressuring a guy when he's in the middle of business is a definite no no. So I played my cool and after making sure that he really wanted to see me and didn't just feel obliged to do so, we met up and made happy.
I swear, this guy is like a sex genie. I can ask him to do anything for me and he delivers with perfect precision with a hint of ecstasy on the side. Like this thing with mirrors, I told him how seeing us in the mirror fascinated me and the rest of the night, he made sure that I got a good view of everything that was going on.
Other than that, I feel totally comfortable being myself with him. The strange thing is that I'm the same way with my lover except that it's a different side of me that emerges when I'm with him. With lover, I get all squirrelly and playful. With M, I'm still playful but I'm much more relaxed and less in a defensive stance.
I guess it's only now when I can see my time with my lover in relation to time spent with M that I realize that I felt like I was walking on eggshells around him because 1) he dangled rejection in front of me like a carrot on a stick, and 2) he didn't allow me to show him that nurturing, caring and affectionate side of me which is also a big part of me.
I don't dislike my lover more after the experience with M. Heck, I've accepted him as is long before but now I know that I could be "loved" more (and I use the term loosely, ok?) M has been wonderful in reassuring me that he wants me to stay, hang around, share his stuff, his time and all that. And by now, I think he's wondering whatever happened to me to get me so skittish. Kind of like when you see a frightened and shy dog at the pound and you wonder what the previous owner did to get it that way.
After a glorious romp in the sack, we slept together. Actually, I had difficulty sleeping. I don't know if he sensed it but I just lay awake there in his arms while we were spooning, wondering what this was all about and kind of hoping he'd say something to give me more clarity. We didn't have enough time to sleep since he had an early flight and we had to get up early so I didn't push having "the conversation".
Truth to tell, I wasn't all gung ho to know the answers either. Last night was my version of "getting back on the bike" after that freak out episode. One thing I learned though, if you just stay quiet and don't push even if circumstances aren't ideal just yet, they come around sooner or later and try to make it up to you. Like today, he said that when he gets back he's going to book up to the weekend so that we could sleep in late and have breakfast. He also mentioned dinner and asked me what my favorite restaurant was. That was nice. At least he has plans to take me out of the "under cover of darkness" category.
He did mention the "G" word -- girlfriend. I swear, in relationships like these that were meant to be in the gray area, that's practically taboo. The thing is, he mentioned it tangentially so I could neither refute nor comment on it. He just said that the folks in the lobby (he's a frequent guest so they all know him) would say when they saw me, "Hey, Mr. A -- you've got a girlfriend!". He mentioned it a couple more times and I guess I was in shock. My exact thoughts at that moment were: "Why are you talking about that?!??" but since it was more of an insinuation rather than a statement of fact, I could do nothing but smile. Cautiously, I might add.
Then the other night too, there was an insinuation of sorts. I had never slept with anyone before and I told him so. I also said that I found out that it was nice after all. And that's when he said, "Only if you like the person". Ummm...does that mean he likes me?
I swear, I am not going to obsess about it. I'm just glad that I seem to improve my intimacy issues with this guy. Physical intimacy first. We can work on emotional intimacy the next time around. I'm just glad that I can talk to him without turning into a bowl of jello. I don't know a lot about him yet so there's still a lot of space to build trust. IOW, I really haven't figured out what my opinion about him is. I think that's good. He's not a character that I've cast in the movie of my life.
Yes, I think I'll see where this one goes.
I ended up giving Lover that "drunken phone call", except that I wasn't drunk and it cost a lot more since I called long distance. I got his machine and told him that I didn't know why I called, told him about my freak out episode and was just basically looking for him. He still hasn't surfaced for air ever since I told him M was in town. I dunno. Maybe he's busy. Whether it's work or another object of his affection (or his cock's affection for that matter), I don't know.
I spent the night with M and was with him until he left for the airport. We had standing arrangments to get together for a "delicious goodbye" last night but his clients took him out and a bit late became later and then later still. This was so reminiscent of the fights I had with my lover that it definitely seemed like deja vu. I didn't know if M was really busy or if he was really out with clients or out on a date or if he was just really not interested and was blowing me off. But of course, I would like to think myself wiser for the experience with my lover and I now know that pressuring a guy when he's in the middle of business is a definite no no. So I played my cool and after making sure that he really wanted to see me and didn't just feel obliged to do so, we met up and made happy.
I swear, this guy is like a sex genie. I can ask him to do anything for me and he delivers with perfect precision with a hint of ecstasy on the side. Like this thing with mirrors, I told him how seeing us in the mirror fascinated me and the rest of the night, he made sure that I got a good view of everything that was going on.
Other than that, I feel totally comfortable being myself with him. The strange thing is that I'm the same way with my lover except that it's a different side of me that emerges when I'm with him. With lover, I get all squirrelly and playful. With M, I'm still playful but I'm much more relaxed and less in a defensive stance.
I guess it's only now when I can see my time with my lover in relation to time spent with M that I realize that I felt like I was walking on eggshells around him because 1) he dangled rejection in front of me like a carrot on a stick, and 2) he didn't allow me to show him that nurturing, caring and affectionate side of me which is also a big part of me.
I don't dislike my lover more after the experience with M. Heck, I've accepted him as is long before but now I know that I could be "loved" more (and I use the term loosely, ok?) M has been wonderful in reassuring me that he wants me to stay, hang around, share his stuff, his time and all that. And by now, I think he's wondering whatever happened to me to get me so skittish. Kind of like when you see a frightened and shy dog at the pound and you wonder what the previous owner did to get it that way.
After a glorious romp in the sack, we slept together. Actually, I had difficulty sleeping. I don't know if he sensed it but I just lay awake there in his arms while we were spooning, wondering what this was all about and kind of hoping he'd say something to give me more clarity. We didn't have enough time to sleep since he had an early flight and we had to get up early so I didn't push having "the conversation".
Truth to tell, I wasn't all gung ho to know the answers either. Last night was my version of "getting back on the bike" after that freak out episode. One thing I learned though, if you just stay quiet and don't push even if circumstances aren't ideal just yet, they come around sooner or later and try to make it up to you. Like today, he said that when he gets back he's going to book up to the weekend so that we could sleep in late and have breakfast. He also mentioned dinner and asked me what my favorite restaurant was. That was nice. At least he has plans to take me out of the "under cover of darkness" category.
He did mention the "G" word -- girlfriend. I swear, in relationships like these that were meant to be in the gray area, that's practically taboo. The thing is, he mentioned it tangentially so I could neither refute nor comment on it. He just said that the folks in the lobby (he's a frequent guest so they all know him) would say when they saw me, "Hey, Mr. A -- you've got a girlfriend!". He mentioned it a couple more times and I guess I was in shock. My exact thoughts at that moment were: "Why are you talking about that?!??" but since it was more of an insinuation rather than a statement of fact, I could do nothing but smile. Cautiously, I might add.
Then the other night too, there was an insinuation of sorts. I had never slept with anyone before and I told him so. I also said that I found out that it was nice after all. And that's when he said, "Only if you like the person". Ummm...does that mean he likes me?
I swear, I am not going to obsess about it. I'm just glad that I seem to improve my intimacy issues with this guy. Physical intimacy first. We can work on emotional intimacy the next time around. I'm just glad that I can talk to him without turning into a bowl of jello. I don't know a lot about him yet so there's still a lot of space to build trust. IOW, I really haven't figured out what my opinion about him is. I think that's good. He's not a character that I've cast in the movie of my life.
Yes, I think I'll see where this one goes.
Cock Chronicles: Tender is the Night
Hi Lover,
Mission accomplished. He finally came in my mouth and he tasted good. =)
We were both still tired from last night's romp. Him even more so because he was working ever since the time I left him so I gave him a massage so that he could unwind first. I don't know if you remember but I was wearing the lingerie that I first wore with you when you told me to get sexier undies, haha. He liked it a lot though. After that we kissed a lot. His lips started exploring my body and so did his hands and I came quite a few times with that.
Anyway, I was not going to let this second chance pass without having a go at tasting him. I started licking his groin area slowly, sensuously, deliberately... was careful to let my tongue just graze his balls and the base of his penis at first... and found erogenous spots I never knew he had before. Then I started licking his balls, my tongue teasing and trailing to the spot beneath the balls just above his anus and started flicking my tongue there. That sort of drove him crazy. I took his balls in my mouth and sucked on them and then licked the length of his cock good before taking the head of his cock in my mouth. I took my time with the head of his cock, and I flicked the tip of my tongue on the spot just right under the head. He was rock hard by this time and that's when I took all of him in my mouth, fucking his cock with my mouth deep and slow. He's really kinda big so I couldn't get everything in my mouth but was deep throating him as much as I could. He kept saying "you do this soooo good" over and over and that's when I picked up the tempo. I felt like my mouth turned into a pussy and he just kept thrusting and fucking me again and again. My hands were squeezing his balls and I could feel his cock harden just as he was about to cum. He came in my mouth and I swallowed every last drop of it. His orgasm lasted a pretty long time. He just kept on cumming in my mouth and that made me suck him better (motivation! haha). I didn't stop fucking him with my mouth and ... dang, he was even noisier than I was! haha. The whole floor must have heard him. He was shuddering and groaning and his grip on my hair was getting tighter and this went on for quite a while and I was actually worried that it was lasting so long (and he was noisy! I mean, I know how this guy cums). It was only when he said "I have to catch my breath" that I eased off on his cock. I still didn't pull away though but just let my tongue trace circles on his cock while it was still in my mouth.
He was pretty much spent after that and could barely keep his eyes open. I kissed him gently on the lips and I trailed light kisses on his chest and pretty much everywhere and then I let him sleep. I snuggled up to him, my head on his chest and my legs intertwined with his. He woke up a couple of minutes after and we talked. Kinda hard to focus on the conversation though when his hands were caressing parts of me and I was getting worked up again. When I could hardly keep my train of thought, he went for my G-spot and that drove me over the edge. Oh yeah, there's a mirror on top of the headboard and dang, the silhouette of two people sensuously fucking is seriously mesmerizing. I couldn't keep my eyes off of it thinking "wow, this is what we look like together". Of course, that didn't last very long because he got me cumming again soon after and although normally my back is arched and my head tilts backward to expose my neck, when it's too much for me, I sort of burrow my face in his neck and my screams turn into whimpers and my hands are digging into his back.
Anyway, it was around 1am about that time and it was early enough for me to go home. I wasn't sure if last night's invite to stay was a fluke so I gave him an out and we had this awkwardly coy moment of "do you want me to go?/ I want you to stay". I stayed the night again. It was nice and intimate. There were times though that I would disengage from the spooning and cuddling and move to my side of the bed and he would reach out for me. Or we would fall asleep and when he would be roused from sleep (I'd wake up too bec i'm a light sleeper), he would take my hand in his and we'd fall right back to sleep holding hands. Pleasurable but a strange experience for me.
Oh, I did have a bit of a freak out episode. I think I woke up at about 4am and found myself wide awake thinking what I was doing with this man. That didn't last long though because I didn't want to think so as soon as he reached out for me and our bodies melded together again, I went right back to sleep.
Next morning, I was getting ready to leave because i knew he had a busy day ahead of him. He was working from his suite this morning but he said I was welcome to stay and be around him if I didn't mind eavesdropping on his business calls. So I hung around for a while, watching tv and just enjoying the bed but I wanted him to work without distraction so I got dressed and ready to go. I think I'm really like a cat sometimes, you know?
Anyway, I'm still horny. I still need cock and I do hope he's got time tonight to get together. He did say that I have soft skin, beautiful breasts (I don't know about that... that's the part of me i dislike the most) and ... get this... that I had a good heart. And i'm like, where did that come from? Totally out of the blue. I mean, this is the fourth time I've been with this guy. I don't know how he could've figured that out about me when i haven't been with him very long. But I didn't ask. I just accepted it and smiled.
So there. My status report for today =P. I haven't seen you around and I do so much want to get with you after this. I like going back to home base =).
GG
Mission accomplished. He finally came in my mouth and he tasted good. =)
We were both still tired from last night's romp. Him even more so because he was working ever since the time I left him so I gave him a massage so that he could unwind first. I don't know if you remember but I was wearing the lingerie that I first wore with you when you told me to get sexier undies, haha. He liked it a lot though. After that we kissed a lot. His lips started exploring my body and so did his hands and I came quite a few times with that.
Anyway, I was not going to let this second chance pass without having a go at tasting him. I started licking his groin area slowly, sensuously, deliberately... was careful to let my tongue just graze his balls and the base of his penis at first... and found erogenous spots I never knew he had before. Then I started licking his balls, my tongue teasing and trailing to the spot beneath the balls just above his anus and started flicking my tongue there. That sort of drove him crazy. I took his balls in my mouth and sucked on them and then licked the length of his cock good before taking the head of his cock in my mouth. I took my time with the head of his cock, and I flicked the tip of my tongue on the spot just right under the head. He was rock hard by this time and that's when I took all of him in my mouth, fucking his cock with my mouth deep and slow. He's really kinda big so I couldn't get everything in my mouth but was deep throating him as much as I could. He kept saying "you do this soooo good" over and over and that's when I picked up the tempo. I felt like my mouth turned into a pussy and he just kept thrusting and fucking me again and again. My hands were squeezing his balls and I could feel his cock harden just as he was about to cum. He came in my mouth and I swallowed every last drop of it. His orgasm lasted a pretty long time. He just kept on cumming in my mouth and that made me suck him better (motivation! haha). I didn't stop fucking him with my mouth and ... dang, he was even noisier than I was! haha. The whole floor must have heard him. He was shuddering and groaning and his grip on my hair was getting tighter and this went on for quite a while and I was actually worried that it was lasting so long (and he was noisy! I mean, I know how this guy cums). It was only when he said "I have to catch my breath" that I eased off on his cock. I still didn't pull away though but just let my tongue trace circles on his cock while it was still in my mouth.
He was pretty much spent after that and could barely keep his eyes open. I kissed him gently on the lips and I trailed light kisses on his chest and pretty much everywhere and then I let him sleep. I snuggled up to him, my head on his chest and my legs intertwined with his. He woke up a couple of minutes after and we talked. Kinda hard to focus on the conversation though when his hands were caressing parts of me and I was getting worked up again. When I could hardly keep my train of thought, he went for my G-spot and that drove me over the edge. Oh yeah, there's a mirror on top of the headboard and dang, the silhouette of two people sensuously fucking is seriously mesmerizing. I couldn't keep my eyes off of it thinking "wow, this is what we look like together". Of course, that didn't last very long because he got me cumming again soon after and although normally my back is arched and my head tilts backward to expose my neck, when it's too much for me, I sort of burrow my face in his neck and my screams turn into whimpers and my hands are digging into his back.
Anyway, it was around 1am about that time and it was early enough for me to go home. I wasn't sure if last night's invite to stay was a fluke so I gave him an out and we had this awkwardly coy moment of "do you want me to go?/ I want you to stay". I stayed the night again. It was nice and intimate. There were times though that I would disengage from the spooning and cuddling and move to my side of the bed and he would reach out for me. Or we would fall asleep and when he would be roused from sleep (I'd wake up too bec i'm a light sleeper), he would take my hand in his and we'd fall right back to sleep holding hands. Pleasurable but a strange experience for me.
Oh, I did have a bit of a freak out episode. I think I woke up at about 4am and found myself wide awake thinking what I was doing with this man. That didn't last long though because I didn't want to think so as soon as he reached out for me and our bodies melded together again, I went right back to sleep.
Next morning, I was getting ready to leave because i knew he had a busy day ahead of him. He was working from his suite this morning but he said I was welcome to stay and be around him if I didn't mind eavesdropping on his business calls. So I hung around for a while, watching tv and just enjoying the bed but I wanted him to work without distraction so I got dressed and ready to go. I think I'm really like a cat sometimes, you know?
Anyway, I'm still horny. I still need cock and I do hope he's got time tonight to get together. He did say that I have soft skin, beautiful breasts (I don't know about that... that's the part of me i dislike the most) and ... get this... that I had a good heart. And i'm like, where did that come from? Totally out of the blue. I mean, this is the fourth time I've been with this guy. I don't know how he could've figured that out about me when i haven't been with him very long. But I didn't ask. I just accepted it and smiled.
So there. My status report for today =P. I haven't seen you around and I do so much want to get with you after this. I like going back to home base =).
GG
Cock Chronicles: Squirrel gets her great white wee wee
Lover,
I'm beginning to love these hot reunions. =P
I'm still tired, sleepy and spent and my pussy is so tender and sore right now, I'm having difficulty sitting down but, but, but.... it was well worth the wait.
We weren't supposed to meet up tonight because his plane was arriving late in the evening but as soon as he got settled in his hotel room, he got in touch. I was still up. Preliminaries got us horny so next thing I know, I'm headed over to his place.
I was supposed to give him a BJ as soon as I walked through the door but my agenda got thwarted. I ring the bell, he opens the door. I look up at him and just smile saying nothing and he then gives me deep long kisses that were rather tender so i didn't push the "hot" thing and just went with the flow. We moved on to the bedroom, he was sitting on the bed, I was standing and we were still kissing and he was running his fingers up and down my legs, the back of my knees (I was wearing a mini), tracing my butt crack through my panties and giving my clit a good rubbing.
Anyway, as soon as we were out of our clothes, BJ time. He happens to like having his balls licked and sucked so it was great that i liked licking and sucking them as well, haha. I told that I wanted to taste him before anything else so I got to work. He did sound like he was enjoying it a lot... BUT... the guy has the stamina of a fucking horse, Tom. Add that to jetlag (he came straight from Seattle) and that equals me sucking him like forever, haha. I actually told him right before we started and several times in between "I'm going to taste you tonight." But then despite my determination, i think he wanted to help me out so he fucked me mindless after that instead, ha ha.
So there. I'll try again tonight.
I don't know how to chronicle the rest of what happened because right now it's just a delicious blur in my head. I think he genuinely finds pleasure in making me cum. And he does several things to me all at the same time that I'm dizzy from it all, i don't know who i am, where I am, who i'm with and that's when he rams his big cock inside of me and it starts all over again. Oh and since I've been celibate for a while, I was incredibly tight and he just loved that. So we did it this way and that and one time, when I was on my knees and he was fucking me from behind, he tried "knocking on the back door" but I guided his cock to my pussy instead. That one's for you, lover. I mean it.
I stayed the night and slept with him. I could have gone home since I live 5 mins away but I thought it was a good opportunity to improve intimacy skills, haha. The challenge this time was "shared sleep". I've never been able to sleep with anyone else in bed with me but i now find that I can. That was nice. I liked that. It was also nice waking up slowly next to someone who's gentle and receptive and not feeling mortified that I woke up in bed with a stranger, haha. Well, not really a stranger anymore because last night, I told him my real name. So there goes my anonymity.
He's pretty observant though. Now, he keeps bottled water by the bedside table for me (i didn't have to ask) and the air is on at my temperature. He gets cold though but I'm warm so that pretty much solves it. I like warming him up and keeping him warm. While we were hanging out in bed though after just waking up, he mentioned that last night I made some strange sounds. Of course, I got paranoid. I thought I had said something I didn't remember or blurted out your name or what but apparently he was just referring to a new and delicious version of my default moan, sigh and groan hahaha. That made me nervous though. I can really hardly remember how I was last night. I just got lost in it.
Anyway, that's my status report. \u003dP I think i did you proud, Lover. Right before I left, he was still raving about how he loved feeling my pussy clamp on his cock and his fingers while I'm cumming.
Where are you? I need to get back to home base, you know. I enjoyed a lot but after that ....I miss you more.
GG
I'm beginning to love these hot reunions. =P
I'm still tired, sleepy and spent and my pussy is so tender and sore right now, I'm having difficulty sitting down but, but, but.... it was well worth the wait.
We weren't supposed to meet up tonight because his plane was arriving late in the evening but as soon as he got settled in his hotel room, he got in touch. I was still up. Preliminaries got us horny so next thing I know, I'm headed over to his place.
I was supposed to give him a BJ as soon as I walked through the door but my agenda got thwarted. I ring the bell, he opens the door. I look up at him and just smile saying nothing and he then gives me deep long kisses that were rather tender so i didn't push the "hot" thing and just went with the flow. We moved on to the bedroom, he was sitting on the bed, I was standing and we were still kissing and he was running his fingers up and down my legs, the back of my knees (I was wearing a mini), tracing my butt crack through my panties and giving my clit a good rubbing.
Anyway, as soon as we were out of our clothes, BJ time. He happens to like having his balls licked and sucked so it was great that i liked licking and sucking them as well, haha. I told that I wanted to taste him before anything else so I got to work. He did sound like he was enjoying it a lot... BUT... the guy has the stamina of a fucking horse, Tom. Add that to jetlag (he came straight from Seattle) and that equals me sucking him like forever, haha. I actually told him right before we started and several times in between "I'm going to taste you tonight." But then despite my determination, i think he wanted to help me out so he fucked me mindless after that instead, ha ha.
So there. I'll try again tonight.
I don't know how to chronicle the rest of what happened because right now it's just a delicious blur in my head. I think he genuinely finds pleasure in making me cum. And he does several things to me all at the same time that I'm dizzy from it all, i don't know who i am, where I am, who i'm with and that's when he rams his big cock inside of me and it starts all over again. Oh and since I've been celibate for a while, I was incredibly tight and he just loved that. So we did it this way and that and one time, when I was on my knees and he was fucking me from behind, he tried "knocking on the back door" but I guided his cock to my pussy instead. That one's for you, lover. I mean it.
I stayed the night and slept with him. I could have gone home since I live 5 mins away but I thought it was a good opportunity to improve intimacy skills, haha. The challenge this time was "shared sleep". I've never been able to sleep with anyone else in bed with me but i now find that I can. That was nice. I liked that. It was also nice waking up slowly next to someone who's gentle and receptive and not feeling mortified that I woke up in bed with a stranger, haha. Well, not really a stranger anymore because last night, I told him my real name. So there goes my anonymity.
He's pretty observant though. Now, he keeps bottled water by the bedside table for me (i didn't have to ask) and the air is on at my temperature. He gets cold though but I'm warm so that pretty much solves it. I like warming him up and keeping him warm. While we were hanging out in bed though after just waking up, he mentioned that last night I made some strange sounds. Of course, I got paranoid. I thought I had said something I didn't remember or blurted out your name or what but apparently he was just referring to a new and delicious version of my default moan, sigh and groan hahaha. That made me nervous though. I can really hardly remember how I was last night. I just got lost in it.
Anyway, that's my status report. \u003dP I think i did you proud, Lover. Right before I left, he was still raving about how he loved feeling my pussy clamp on his cock and his fingers while I'm cumming.
Where are you? I need to get back to home base, you know. I enjoyed a lot but after that ....I miss you more.
GG
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